Hmms, will not be blogging so much because my comp is infected with a fucking irritating virus, and it will be a miracle if i can finish typing this entry.

Well, things have not been good btwn me and hubby. We`re not as loving as we were in the past, we are sorta living in our own world,not like in the past when we both live in the same world. He is constantly playing DOTA and always neglecting me. Told him about this many times, but if he doesnt want to do anything about it, our r/s would turn bad and soon, everything would end. I dont want this to end and im trying very hard to accomodate to what he wants, but it takes two hands to clap, i cant be the only one trying so hard to save the r/s and yet he goes on that way. Our one year is approaching, yes im happy we`re tgt for so long, but on the other hand, im really sad that we have to be like this now. Calls are getting shorter and lesser, msges are also getting lesser and even meeting each other is getting lesser. Hais, i really dont know what to do anymore. He says he still loves me, yet i cant feel anything from him, not like the past when he said he loved me and i know its true. The feeling he gives me now is he is just saying for the sake of it. Hais, i cant be expecting too much, im really tired of everything. Just like on thursday, he told me he would stay over on saturday but on friday, he told me his ah ma would be coming back today den i told him his ah ma confirm wont allow him to come over to my hse to stay and he said confirm can, he ask he confirm can persuade her to allow him, but today, he said he cant come today. He himself should know his own ah ma better than me, and yet he still promised me, he made me feel so happy one moment and the next, im down in the ditches, feeling so sad and disappointed and pissed off. What for promise me when he knows he cant make it and knows that i fucking hate pple tht brk their promises. No words can describe the way we are now, but we`re definitely not LOVING anymore. Hais..im really tired alrdy.